A Mid-Morning Jesus Rave with the Holman Girls

Caroline and Josephine are totally hooked on the songs from Henry's VBS -- which was over three months ago. Whatever subliminal mumbo-jumbo is conveniently hidden in those tracks has brainwashed my girls into dancing fools.

All we're missing is the tamborines, shaved-heads and airport literature and I can qualify the family as a 501(c)(3).

Anyway, check this out.

IU 38, Akron 21: Rob Avoids Alma Maters Tying

We made it out to the IU/Akron football game at Akron's new football stadium.

Here's the hilariously short article from the Indianapolis Star concerning the game. In case you didn't make it to the game or catch it on the Big Ten Network, the Hoosiers carried the day 38-21.

It will be the last victory for the Hoosier football program this year. Savor it.


And when you get done savoring the Hoosier football season, I want to leave you with this image of what they call "Magnifico Nachos" at Brubaker's Pub in downtown Akron, Ohio.


Apparently, the names "Cha-Cha-Cha Maker" and "What Spain Killed the Aztecs With" were taken.

Congratulations to the Hoosiers on another three-win football season.

It makes watching a Browns game seem optimistic, even though it's clearly not.

Caroline's First Day of Pre-School

Caroline started pre-school last week. It's a pretty big deal because Caroline is Henry's biggest admirer/competitor, so being on her own without her noteworthy wingman has, at times, proven difficult (read: impossible).

Yes, I know she has a younger sister.

Judging by the picture below, it's obvious that Josie is not ready for girly breakout sessions.



Anyway, back to Caroline and her first day of pre-school.

Caroline was all smiles in the warmup. Mom did all of the Jim Rickon PMA talking points.

"You'll meet new friends!"

"You'll have fun playing and singing!"

"You're going to be fine!"

Et cetera, etc.




Caroline was pumped up and buying into it.

Here she is (below) performing the "O-H" "I-O" chant. (That's too bad since she's going to IU when she grows up.)

Or maybe she's predicting the number of Browns victories in September. Or Buckeye wins against ranked opponents. Or Hoosier victories in the Big Ten.

I could go on, but I believe that horse is glue.




Back to Caroline's first day. It seemed like the idea of singing and dancing at school excited her! Here she is (below) moments later in full Mary Poppins-mode.



And if we could stop the story there, we'd be able to tell you that she enjoyed every moment of her first day of pre-school and begged us to go back the next day.

But you know our sweet Caroline.



Wait for it...



...wait for it...




The clock struck midnight and the carriage became a pumpkin. So much for all that singing and dancing.

"School is stupid."

-Caroline Paige Holman, countless times in September, 2009

We Have Met Put-in-Bay and It Is Ours

Last weekend, we took the kids out to Put-in-Bay, Ohio.

For those who don't know about PIB, that's Ohio's version of "island living". To me, it's just another tourist trap that needed to be put out of it's misery by the Holmans.

Here we are on the ferry boat ride from Catawba Island (not an island, BTW) to PIB. In case you were wondering, that's a 3 o'clock sun on Lake Erie. Dad didn't have high hopes that PIB could entertain his brood for a full day.

Dad was probably right.

We rented a 6-person golf cart to travel around the island. Since it was Labor Day weekend, cars were not allowed on the island. We were one of the last ones to get a cart. If it wasn't for Erica getting into a fist fight with a line cutter, we would have been walking that God-forsaken island.

The kids thought the cart was "awesome". I think Erica is awesome. I'm also slightly scared of her.

Our first stop was the Perry Monument. It's under construction so we didn't try to climb it. Since it's taller than the Statue of Liberty, that's probably a good thing.

I got the kids to give their best impression of the monument.

This was their effort. I don't think Joey was into it, do you?



After a brief walk around the monument, we made our way back through town where the smell of booze, cheap lobster bisque and tattooed toothless biker babes was more than one could bear.

It makes one wonder what Canada thinks of us.

Anyway, Caroline, Henry and I decided we would tackle Perry's Cave -- another PIB tribute to the man who whooped the British navy in 1813.

Strangely, the kids got caught up in gem stone mining outside the cave (read: tourist trap for children).

Here's how it worked:

Spend $10 on a bag of sand. Yes, a bag of sand. Then, take it outside to dump in a screener.


Screen out the sand and look for gemstones in the bag.


Henry found a few "gems".

And if you look close enough, the "gems" are actually pieces of glass from the nearby booze huts.

In normal society, we call that a scam. In PIB, we call it family fun.

Granted, we never paid the $10 for the useless sand bag. No, not the Holmans. We just positioned ourselves at the end of the trough where all of the sand and "gems" had come out of the other suckers who paid the money for it.

We panned for gems like it was 1849 -- at other people's expense.

That's how you entertain a family during a recession.

Afterwards, we followed the cave and gemstone mining fiasco with some chocolate and fudge. Caroline was pretty happy to watch Mom tackle a chocolate-covered Twinkie.

Truthfully, so was I.

Josie was just happy to be out of the back seat of the golf cart.

PIB. Where else can you mix drunk, toothless tattooed freaks with family fun?

Please don't answer that. I don't want to know where we have to go next.