My Son the Documentarian

Henry broke out the parents camera (without permission) and recorded a classic documentary of what the Ohio cousins do to pass the time during a Browns Sunday.

A couple of plot twists to watch for:

- Caroline's dollhouse is so "yesterday".
- Maura and Henry have a baby named Josephine?
- Josephine may have been attached to a Doodle-Pro.
- Speaking of Josie, did Maddy drop her or was that just me?
- Henry breaks off the show before facing certain punishment upstairs.

Enjoy!

The First Snow

Black Friday turned white for Holmans-North.  What were supposed to be flurries turned into 2 inches of heavy wet snow on the day after Thanksgiving.

So much for shopping.

Erica and the kids were giddy.  You would have thought school was canceled.  I hated to break it to them that we were already on vacation.

The kids were quickly outfitted in last year's snowsuits and hustled outside.  It's fun to see how much your kids have grown over the course of one year by comparing them to last year's snowsuit.

Unfortunately, it also increases their chances of frostbite, self-imposed wedgies and being pummeled by bullies for looking ridiculous.

The kids and I used the unusually wet snow to make the fastest melting snowman in neighborhood history.  Using half of the backyard for snowman material, we managed to finish a giant snowman only to watch it fall over in less than twenty minutes.

I'm happy to point out that the base of the snowman is still going strong more than 48 hours after construction.  Unfortunately, it's going to be in the upper 50's today. 

I don't think it'll make it to December.

A Poogie Thanksgiving

Another Thanksgiving in the books here in Poogieville.  This year's edition included Uncle Chris, Aunt Holly, Tyler and Autumn who joined us for the feast. 

The turkey was deep-fried for the fourth consecutive year.  Erica shot some footage of me from the kitchen.

 

In case you were wondering, I always fry turkeys in full flame retardant gear and I always invite the local media to watch me set the neighborhood on fire.

The weather was fantastic this year.  For those of you who have braved a Thanksgiving over at Holmans-North, it's either going to be sunny and in the 60's or windy and snowing sideways. 

There are no "in-betweens" in NE Ohio.

Here are the kids before the cousins arrived.  They waited nearly fifteen minutes at the front door for the fun to start.  I love their dedication.

Here's a picture of the deep-fried bird.  She topped the scales at roughly ninteen pounds and took an hour or so to fry.

Here's a picture of the fryor.  He topped in at 200 lbs. with the walking boots and November scruff.  I have no clue how long I would take to crisp up, but in 2001 it only took about three hours in the Sarasota sun.

(A note about Erica: she did another fantastic job putting together some all-star sides and putting up with me.)

Caroline was Mom's kitchen helper this year.  She even stirred the corn casserole and sunk the butter patties with a butter knife.

And then Caroline proceeded to "plant" the butter knife in the corn casserole and it was thoroughly baked into the side dish at 350 degrees.  A thank you to Holly for finding the knife during dinner.

If anyone in our family ever does time, have Caroline send you her version of "Corn Casserole".  You'll be out in no time.  I'm sure she can also fit a shiv into a Dora book, if you need it.

We used our red wine glasses this year.  Ironically, our red wine glasses are actually white wine glasses.   Thus, if someone asks you if you want red wine glasses for a gift, make sure you specify whether it is a red wine glass or a Red Wine glass.

Don't make me explain the difference.

(We love you, Nana.)

And speaking of parents.  The Big Guy and Grandma were on the shelf with BG's version of alien childbirth -- kidney stones.

Erica made two meals for the grandparents and I ran slowly walked it over.  Here's me and my dad on Thanksgiving enjoying the view from the medical ward.

I'd try to spin a funny story about kidney stones, but I don't think there is one.

Here's a picture of me and BG's "nurse" before they broke into costume.  C'mon, you know they totally did.

Finally, we concluded Thanksgiving with a visit from the neighbors who are back from nearly two months in Arizona.  The homecoming was bittersweet for us.  I mean, those late-night parties we hosted at their house were wild and fun.  I had no idea how we were going to get zebra dung off the carpet or the midget out of their dishwasher.

Thank God for Goo-Gone and a crowbar.

(Yes, I know the correct term is "little person.")

Anyway, the kids made up for lost time and were put in trance by our movie theater popcorn popper.  If Mason ever asks you to eat his popcorn, take my advice.  Don't. 

Mason believes in warming the popcorn kernels to about 75 degrees, then dumping them straight into a bowl. 

He's probably going to loose some teeth that way.

Running in Your Mid-30's: A Cautionary Tale

It's been a slow go for the Mayor of Poogieville.

The picture below helps describe the situation.

Nope. It isn't the fact that I'm watching E! entertainment television clips of Johnny Depp. Although, that's weird in and of itself.

Nope. The consequence of starting an unsupervised running regimen in your mid-30's is that you might end up doing what I did. You see, those are my feet.

Two broken ankles.

At least two torn tendons.

And six weeks of humiliation sporting not one, but two walking boots.

Can someone get me a beer from the fridge? This sucks.

No Theme Required: Randomness in Poogieville

Here's the answer to the question: "What we do on a Friday night?"

More random pictures below.

Caroline (photo by Josie, 2009)

Erica (photo by Erica, 2009)

[Editor's Note: Makeup by Caroline]

Anti-Gravity Josie (photo by Caroline, 2009)

Happy Henry (photo by Caroline, 2009)

And lastly, the Two Peg.

More on that in a minute...

Me. (photo by Caroline, 2009)

Bye-Kea in Words

Bye-Kea weekend.

Our annual trip to Ikea during the Browns bye week.

If you need visuals, Billy Brew has a couple of pictures posted on Holmanium and a nice write-up on the trip.

We used the Browns bye week to extend Caroline's birthday and to erase the horror that has become the Cleveland Browns football season. As a wrinkle, we made the trip into an overnight with a stop at Great Wolf Lodge in Mason, Ohio and a picnic at Loveland Castle.

We managed to not take a single picture during the trip, which is a shame because there were plenty of moments that were blogworthy.

Bill's depiction is accurate, though.

Indoor waterparks have an over-abundance of the following:

1. Tattoos - I reached my lifetime quota of "tramp-stamps" and armband "barbed wire" tattoos during the visit to GWL.

For those who want to see what funny looks like, I found this on the web. [Note the heavy use of skinny-boy flex with the tricep...this dude was a master at his craft.]

2. Body hair - I thought I was at a Joseph Enterprises convention. I kept looking for the guy below to make an appearance:

3. Unhealthy lack of friendly advice - if you are wearing a bathing suit that makes someone around you throw up in their own mouth, you should not come to the waterpark.

See below:

4. Spooky animatronics. GWL provides its guests with a twice-daily rendition of some song that is a total knock-off of Lion King's "Circle of Life". Freaky-looking animatronic animals and a mannequin-esque Native American girl move around and sing a song to the same tune but with lyrics that caution children that "there's nothing to be afraid of at GWL."

It was creepy. We didn't stick around for the end.

Overall, though, everyone had a ball.

Good times.

Caroline: They Say It's Your Birthday!

Caroline celebrated her 4th birthday on November 4th. For those who don't know, she was born a middle child two and one half years before Josie arrived.

We almost named her Bill.

Anyway, poor Caroline. Her birthday started out rough. Her 4 year checkup resulted in a flu misting AND a shot. Not the best planning, but thankfully I pulled the long straw.

I feel bad for Mom, though. I heard it was fairly traumatic.

If I were the doctor, I'd strongly consider witness protection. As a warning to the unwary, Caroline's DEFCON 1 is calling someone a "maniac". If she throws that at you, she considers you dead to her.

Think of Caroline's logo as follows:


I think her pediatrician made the "maniac" list.

I worry about the next appointment.

But let's cut back to the birthday.

Apparently, shots, flu mists and birthday drama lead to drowsiness. This is CP2 shortly before her birthday party.

Despite her rough morning and her late nap, Caroline rallied nicely for the big show. Here's the birthday girl opening gifts.

And the group of cousins who joined the celebration.

When it came to the cake, Caroline surprised her old man by hanging in for the full Happy Birthday song without tears. In fact, she almost blew out her candles before remembering how un-Holman North it is to enjoy birthday singing and candle blowouts.

There's always next year, kiddo!

Seriously though, CP2 is the apple of her dad's eye and there's nothing we wouldn't do to get a slew of smiles on her special day.

Or at least that's what I will continue to tell her so she doesn't put me on the "maniac" list.

Happy Birthday, Caroline!

The Earnestness of Caroline Paige

Vintage Caroline. Serious, solemn and unabashedly deserving of a hug.

Stay with this video to see why.

When asked, Caroline said the reason she cried was because she wanted to go to Mommy.

I thought she was crying because of the Ninja. That kid was selling it.

Halloween 2009: Poogie Style

This year, October was a blur. No pumpkin patches. No fighting off bees at the kettle corn stand. No corn mazes. Nothing.

Weird.

Nevertheless, the family did manage to run the gauntlet of pre-Halloween parties.

There was the Hudson Preschool Parents throwdown where our niece's kindergarten teacher was the entertainment.

[Editor's Note: Dude does magic AND wears rainbow suspenders! Anyone know of anything more courageous than that? Me neither.]

Here are the girls at the HPP function:

Then there was the Penn State v. Michigan neighborhood party where I went in as an IU fan sporting a 25 point lead on the road at Northwestern and left a one point loser.

Insert your prophetic statements concerning my life here.

Actually, it was fun to watch people actually concerned about Saturday afternoon college football. It was strange.

And did I mention that I drank the sting of the IU loss to excess?

Well, if not, there's only one way to challenge me under those circumstances...put a knife in my hand and let me carve a $6.00 rotten pumpkin!

Yep. They wheeled a despondent and partially loaded dad over to Uncle Bill's house for pumpkin carving after the first party.

Here's the result:


A couple of notes on the carving this year.

1. Carving a rotten gourd is depressing, especially when you know you paid top dollar for it.
2. Henry actually designed his own pumpkin this year. Erica performed the knife work.
3. Don't drink and carve.

Anyway, in case you were wondering. Caroline was Belle from Beauty and the Beast. Henry was Iron Man. Josephine was Minnie Mouse.


Uncle Bill? He was a pirate. It made everything he said on Halloween easier to put into context.

We'll leave you with an ear-to-ear smile from our little Joey who thinks fallen leaves are cool to crush under her tiny-sized shoes.

Next up, Caroline's birthday on November 4th.